Friday, June 11, 2010


I love you my angel (part 15.. The last part)

please start reading from part 1:,9640.0.html

[b]friends are requested to read the earlier parts before reading this one to understand..... This is the 15th part of the story.... U hv to read the other 14 parts before...and to do this you are kindly requested to go to other pages where the other parts has been move to page 2...3...4...or may be to page 5....keep turning the pages till you get all the parts which starts as from part 1.... Thanks....shah.[/b]

later when i related all this to kaajal she told me if at least mehj would have done a step towards me i could know that she was still there for me. But the way she was behaving i should give up and forget her!! Everybody was telling me the same thing……… i was in a dilemna. I did not know what to do!! I had anger filled in my heart but i wanted my love to be the winner. I wanted to give a last chance to it.

But as my mom and sis related me the day i was sick and mehj's parents had come home they had said that they will really kill me if ever they will see me there any time again.....

Well, after that the 19th february, i felt i had been suffering for mehj during the last six months in vain!! I loved her for the first six months to suffer the next six months all alone!! I wonder if ever she suffered like i did for her.

I was very restless and my heart was paining a lot. Why had i to suffer alone like that? Why she was in my thoughts every time? Night, day, walking, sitting, sleeping, working, on the road, at work, on bed, in prayer, in garden, every where she was with me. Every where, what ever i did, where ever i went her thoughts were with me. She never left me. But she? Was she as me?

For the first time i felt hatred for her in my heart!! I felt she had been playing with me all that time!! She wanted to experience sex with a man and she got me and she quenched her thirst with me. And that was the end for her!! This is what kind of thoughts started coming in my mind for her then!!

I started cursing her!! I said she will never be happy in her life! She can get another man to get married but she will never get the love she got with me. The caring which she got with me, she will cry for it, she will yearn for it but will never get it! She will try to find me in the man who will be in her life but she will never get it. The man will not love her. He will just be his husband in name, but he will have affairs with other women. He will be someone materialistic. He will mean only business. He will not know the value of love and mehj will cry for love all her life till she dies! She has made me suffer so much, so that is the way she will pay for it!! She will miss me all her life she will now wish to see me but will never see me in her life. She will wish to hear my voice but she will never hear it. She will suffer all her life. She will never know what hapiness is. She will end her whole life in misery. I wish the worst for her for making me cry so much, for making me suffer so much, for lying to me that she loves me and will always be by my side whatever happens…. I will never forget all that she promised me in her last letter and she turned out of her words and promises. I will never forgive her for all that she has done to me during the last six months!! She is a betrayer and a heartbreaker. She is a big bewafa. And she will meet all bewafas in her life………… i can only curse her….. Only bad duwas were coming for her from the depth of my heart!! If she loved me she should have never prevented mahfuz and nusayha to take my letters. Instead she should have been happy that i was trying my best to reach her and she should have replied me through them!! But no. She wanted to finish and she had no guts to tell it to me!!

And when i thought the words amina said that mehj has said.......

"i was not the man she should have loved!!She has now realised that she was wrong at the time that she was with me"!!!

So i did not believe all that amina said because she is a great liar. She had said many many lies on me to mehj so same way she said these words to make me disgust her,,, but she did not know that i had already started hating her daughter before she said all that!!

Now she also told my elder bro that she will seriously take the matter to the police for harassment case!!........... Now my elder bro told this matter to my mother, and to my sisters…. They were all worried and requested me to finish with her…. My mother cried a lot with me thinking that i may be jailed for a simple matter as this!!!!

And it was only my mothers words and tears that made me take a serious decision!! It was to take mehjabeen out of my heart!! It was the first time that i decided to do that!! Since the last january 2006 till this january 2007 it was the first time on the sunday 21st february that i decided to take her out of my heart and throw her to hell….

And i solemnly told it to my mother and to naaz that i am seriously finishing with mehjabeen for ever and ever!! I no longer love her i said. Naaz was very happy. She knows me very well and she knows when i say something i mean it and i will do it at all cost!!

And to my own surprise i was astounded to feel myself very relaxed and easy after saying that!! I never thought that i will feel so at ease after taking that decision. It was as if a burden which was removed from my heart!! How easy and light i was feeling after that. I had as if no troubles. I had no worries about mehj anymore!! I was hurting myself in vain during all these days!! Just taking one right decision made me feel so good!!..... But i wanted a change in my life... I wanted to do something different so as to keep away from torturing myself with her thoughts....

I was completely relaxed. Oh god!!Such heart aches ,so many sufferings, so many tears, all that was in vain?? Cant explain all that... Even got to consult phychiatrist and psychologist!!!!

But i know that the truth was that i loved her with all my heart and i suffered because my love was true and sincere. But she betrayed me, i had to take a decision and when i took it i felt good. And that was better…… mehjabeen is no more my angel who loved me during the first six months! I still have sweet memories of that mehj who loved me so much and rebelled with her parents because of me. The one who would not sleep till i don’t call her. That was my real mehjabeen. But the actual one has killed my angel to replace her. So i cant accept this one in my life. I had to give up and i know that was the right choice for me. And it is done. And it cannot be changed anymore!!!!!

And that night naaz started being afraid lest those people will come again to hurt me like they did in the past…. Each evevning she started worrying and shivering… but this time i prepared myself. I kept huge arms, daggers, and many weapons to receive them if in case they were to come!!......... But nobody came till today…. Naaz asks me to be very careful on the road when i go to work in case they can attack me any time any where… but am not scared at all… i will face them if ever they come in my way!! And this time i am sure that they will be wounded by me, and they will be very severely injured if ever they try to touch me!..... Even kajal and fatma are afraid for me...they always ask me to be careful on the road and not to talk to any stranger.....

And till today the i did not go there at all..... Did not try at all to contact her.. But i got her news with her friends somes weeks ago...... I have heard that she and nusayha will both soon get engaged!!!!! Well i took out the hatred from my heart when i heard that and despite me i deep in my heart prayed that she be happy always.

And today saturday 20th october 2007.... I know deep inside my heart i still love her and will always do.... I will never be able to love anyone that way in my life...of this i am sure.... .......... But she??? Does she still love me?? Who can reply me this?? Shall we ever be together again??.... Who knows???...... Thats the end of this true story dear friends of lovebeats... I thank all of you for giving me your precious time to read all this...your comments are most welcomed..... Thanks to all of you. Thanks a lot friends.[/b]

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