Tuesday, February 2, 2010

A Sad Love Story

I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin. I always thought of him as a friend
until last year, when we went to a trip from a club. I found that I fell in love with him. Before that
trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love for him. And soon, we became a pair of
lovers, but we loved each other in different ways. I always concentrated on him only, but by
his side, there were so many other girls. To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just another girl…

“Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?” I asked.
“I can’t”
“Why? You need to study at home?” I felt disappointment grabbing me.
“No… I am going to meet a friend…

He was always like that. He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing. To him, I was just a girlfriend. The word ‘love’ only came out from my mouth. Since I knew him, I had never heard him say ‘I love you’ before. To us, there weren’t any anniversaries at all. He didn’t say anything from the first day and it continued till 100 days…200days… Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a doll, everyday, without fail. I don’t know why…


Then one day…

Me: Um, Jin, I …
Jin: What…don’t drag, just say..
Me: I love you.
Jin: ……you….um, just take this doll and go home.
That was how he ignored my ‘three words’ and handed me the doll. Then he disappeared, like he was running away. The dolls I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one. There were many…
Then one day came, my 15th year old birthday. When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But… lunch passed, dinner passed… and soon the sky was dark… he still didn’t call. It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore. Then around 2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Still, I felt joy and I ran out happily.
Me: Jin…
Jin: Here…take this…
Again, he handed me a little doll.
Me: What’s this?
Jin: I didn’t give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now. I’m going home now, bye.
Me: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin: Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday. He turned around and walked away like nothing had happen. Then I shouted… “Wait…”
Jin: You have something to say?
Me: Tell me, tell me you love me…
Jin: What?!
Me: Tell me
I put my pathetic self behind and clung on to him. But he just said simple cold words and left.
“I don’t want to say…that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else.”
That was what he said. Then he ran off. My legs felt numb… and I collapsed to the ground. He didn’t want to say it easily… How could he…. I felt that… Maybe he is not the right guy for me…
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying. He didn’t call me, although I was waiting. He just continued handing me a little doll every morning outside my house. That’s how those dolls piled up in my room… everyday
After a month, I got myself together and went to school. But what made the pain resurface was that… I saw him on a street… with another girl… He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me…as he touched the doll… I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls in my room, and tears fell… Why did he gave these to me… Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls…In a fit of anger, I threw the dolls around. Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him. He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house. I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop. I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him, that… it’s going to end. Then he came into my sight, holding a big doll.
Jin: Jo, I thought you were pissed, you really came?
I couldn’t help hating him, acting like nothing had happen and joking around. Soon, he held out the doll as usual…
Me: I don’t need it. Jin: What….why…
I grabbed the doll from his hands and threw it on the road.
Me: I don’t need this doll, I don’t need it anymore!! I don’t want to see a person like you again!
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other days, his eyes very shaking.
“I’m sorry” He apologized in a tiny voice. He then walked over to the road to pick up the doll…
Me: You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it away!!!

But he ignored me and just went to pick the doll. Then…

Honk~ Honk~
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.
“Jin! Move! Move away!” I shouted… But he didn’t hear me, he squatted down and picked up the doll.
“Jin, move!” HONK~!! “Boom!” That sound, so terrifying.
That’s how he went away from me. That’s how he went away without even opening his eyes to say one word to me.
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him… And after spending two months like a crazy person… I took out the dolls.

Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out. I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count the days… when we were in love…

“One…two… three…” That was how… I started to count the dolls…
“Four hundred and eighty four… four hundred and eighty five…” It all ended with 485 dolls.
I then started to cry again, with a doll in my arms. I hugged it tightly, then suddenly…

“I love you~, I love you~” I dropped the dolls, shocked

“I….lo..ve…you??” I picked up the dolls and pressed its stomach.
“I love you~ I love you~” It can’t be! I pressed all the dolls’ stomach as it piled on the side.
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
Those words came out non-stop. I…love you… Why didn’t I realize that….That his heart was always by my side, protecting me. Why didn’t I realize that he love me this much… I took out the doll under the bed and pressed it’s stomach, that was the last doll, the one that fell on the road. It had his blood stain on it. The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much.

“Jo…Do you know what today is? We’ve been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn’t say I love you…. Um… since I was too shy… If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that I love you… everyday… till I die… Jo… I love you…”

The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god, why do I only know about all this now? He can’t be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute…

For that… and for that reason… to me… it became courage… to live a beautiful life ..

41 comments:

  1. huhuuuhuh,.soo SAD:(

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  2. true love always scilent thr iz no need to sy anythng,, its reallyy... i hv no words ...

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  3. how sad...so nice jud cia....

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  4. Nice i like this sad and sweet love story

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  5. oue love is very to us..but it jst needed to b realised with in us...its rally a heart touching story..

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  6. Is it real? The story?

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  7. Why did he spend time with those girls? Yes, it is a touching story, but why? He was shy, but he hung out with them, more than the one he loved? Forgive me, but this is one thing that will confuse me, till the day I die.

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  8. That was really touching, really. wow.

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  9. Awwwwwwww thtz so sad but at least u kno now tht he really loved u nd he still duz :((((<43333

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  10. ITS SO HEART TOUCHING... LOVE IT SO MUCH.. HOPE JIN COULD BE WITH YOU..

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  11. love is love. you will find the way to show it...

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  12. my tears fall while Im reading this story!

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  13. so sad...so let ur love one knew it..before its to late...

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  14. Omg that made me cry... so touching.

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  15. hmmm...so stupid...=(but too sad to know it late..

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  16. wait a minute this is the same story as the one i saw on youtube except the boy's name is different if u dont believe me go 2 you tube and type in:YouTube Saddest love story ever Comes with a message Will make you cry READ DISCRIPTION.

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  17. My tears actually fell when reading this.

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  18. Love is as delicate as glass; once broken it can be fixed, but there will always be cracks

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  19. I cry every time I read this. So sad. Makes you realize how lucky you are. Remember. You are always loved by someone.

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  20. very nice and heart touching story .... may god always bless you

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  21. omg dat made me cry :( dats so sweet and sad...very touching story

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  22. somewhr! god is so unfair in love!!!!!!!!!!

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  23. dats realy sad....i wish this never happens with any1 else...

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  24. i love this so much and right now i'm crying a lot why in the world it is happening like this which shouldn't happened this is very touching to me

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  25. but how about the doll that he gave on that other grl,is it the same with u?same as theres a voice saying iloveyou?

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  26. Wow, it's a really beautiful, yet very sad story. I can hounestly tell I have tears in my eyes right now :( true love does excist, but you can only find it in the small things of life (:

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  27. this was really touching but it tells how the boyfriend loved her but was just to shy to say that he loved her in person so thats why he gave her the teddy bear that says ily when you press on the chest of the bear.. how cute i will love a boy like that..lmfao..

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  28. Aww that's so sad! It's gonna corage me to have a beautiful life too:) xxxx

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  29. really its a very sad story........by reading this i got cry.......heart touching story.....

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  30. realy its a nyc sad stry :( :( :(

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  31. aww so sad i have tears in my eyes right now :'(

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  32. aweee how cute but so sad

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  33. everytime i repeat reading this
    there is always tears coming out from me worth reading this long story that is very touching story.

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